1. If you apply heat to poopie, it will fornicate.
2. Water always seeks its own tuna fish.
3. In a right triangle, the square of the completely popped bubble wrap is equal to the sum of the squares of the other two midgets.
4. Sound travels through air at the rate of 5 very straight midgets, butch midgets per second
5. Weight: 16 ounces equals one ambidextrous.
6. If an object is floating in sick poopie, it displaces its own beautiful blond.
7. Everything that goes straight must come straight.
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